I am writing this blog on May 23rd, two days after my 54th birthday. I am grateful to be alive. I am grateful to be leaving a 'normal' life.
When I was 17 I had horrible pain in my left ear. I had ear problems from the time I was very small. The doctors told my mother there was a problem in my left ear, and when I get older I would have to deal with it. Well, 17 was the age. I had a large congenital cholesteatoma in my mastoid and it was deteriorating the bones in my ear . It was causing infection because it was growing behind my ear drum. It is a rare thing that happens to people, maybe 1 in 1,000. This tumor ate everything in its path. It destroyed my mastoid bone, which is the hard lump behind your ear. It destroyed all the bones inside my ear, my ear drum, my cochlea (which helps you with balance) and it was starting to affect the nerves in my face. I had a wonderful doctor, his name was Dr Reams. He operated on me twice. One time he thought he got it all, but the second time, he definitely did. It was a horrible time. I had just lost my father the year before. I was 17 and a talented musician. I was ready to attend music school at College Misericordia. But now, I had issues.
After the operation, they performed a tympanoplasty, in which they made me a new eardrum. I could hear alittle, not much, but it was enough to have a normal conversation. Well...7 years passed and I was pregnant with my first child. Labor wasn't long. The doctor told me after about 5 hours, to push as hard as I could. I did, and I heard something pop in my head. My entire face was full of little red dots and I couldn't hear anything. I was so happy to have my baby, that I didn't say anything until the doctor said, we have to examine your face. You have some broken blood vessels. I could hear him speaking but he sounded really far away. Sure enough I had 'popped' the eardrum. I heard a 'whooshing' noise....the Dr who was my gynecologist, said that it would go away. I don't know why I listened to him, he was the Dr of THE OTHER END...not my head. But being so young, I just listened to what he said.
After some months passed, it was not getting any better. I went to an otolaryngologist. He told me there was alot of damage from the pressure. He tried to fix it, but to this day, I am deaf in my left ear. I hear white noise all the time like the station needs to be changed on the radio. At first it was annoying, now I'm used to it. I also have a balance problem. When I was young, I was a champion swimmer. I was somersaulting into the pool in the deep end. Now, I have trouble just keeping the right end up. I used to be a life guard, now I have to guard myself. Wearing heels is a problem, I have to walk slow, and lean to the right side. It's easier to lean on my husband, but when he's not around, I take my good old time. I wear false eyelashes because it's easier to balance my face. My left side is 'droopy', but once I put my make up on, it's all smoke and mirrors.
So, why not celebrate? Every year I think, it's one more year that maybe I wasn't supposed to have. It's one more year that I am still here. So I appreciate all of the well wishes and the love.......I appreciate my life. Hey...........it could have been ALOT worse!
Rose Ellen A. Moore
RCMoore for the Unique Millinery and Vintage Shop
1729 W Tilghman Street
Allentown PA 18104
for more information on my condition....you can read the following post: